REINCARNATION: DO YOU BELIEVE IT OR NOT?
Born in a Hindu Brahmin family I have gone through rituals right from my birth. I was introduced to Reincarnation recently when I saw my Kundli (Natal chart). A section in my natal chart talks about my previous life. It says that I was an Ashva (a Horse) in previous life. It’s hard to believe. Hinduism and other ancient religions along with some modern religion like Spiritism, Theosophy, and Eckankar have a common belief that the soul or spirit, after biological death, begins a new life in a new body that may be human, animal or spiritual depending on the moral quality of the previous life’s actions.
Karma is what I believe in. Tulsidas, a Hindu saint, said: “Our destiny was shaped long before the body came into being.” Then there are people who say: Our destiny lies in our own hands. I go with the latter one. Hindus provide several reasons why the life takes on various physical bodies:
- To experience the fruits of one’s karmas
- To satisfy one’s desires
- To complete one’s unfinished sadhana
- To fulfil a debt
- To undergo sufferings because of a great soul’s curse
- To attain moksha
I believe that each life on this planet has a specific role to play. To me this is my life. What’s life before birth and what’s life after death is meaningless. You achieve and lose everything and nothing in this life. It’s true that not all desires get fulfilled in one single life. If reincarnation is true I should know my unfulfilled desire of previous life as a horse. Do I know it? Nope! One should understand the fact that he/she is a part of this world and what is it that he/she can give to this world. Try putting more into this world than taking out from it. Animals have instincts and they play their role. We humans have brains but we seldom use it.
For me the above six reasons for reincarnation held true if applied for a single lifetime and not for cycles of life. One experiences the consequences of his/her deeds. One tends to satisfy all his/her desires. One learns (sadhana) throughout his life. One fulfils his/her debt in one or the other way. I don’t believe in curse and blessings. When you die you recall what you have done in your life. If that satisfies you then you have attained moksha. So I would like to say one thing, believe in yourself and live your life.
(MY PERFECT SPACE FOR READING AND WRITING)
Have you ever imagined a room at your place where you can read and write? I have imagined it. I wish to build a room which is calm, tranquil, energetic and organised.
The room is rectangular in shape with alpine white colour on three of its walls. The floor is made of wood whose colour and texture complements the colour of room. It is a dark wood colour. I am sitting on a swivel chair which has two separate cushions to rest your head and lower back at a time. The base of the chair is slightly inclined. The chair has a foot-ring like a draughtsman chair where I can keep my legs and then lean and rest my back. I don’t like to get up when I write. But when I write I always find something or the other missing. The chair needs wheels to drag me to the point I want. One of the walls on my left has regular brick arrangement texture. The wall has an array of four paintings arranged in a square format. Two of the paintings have a mystery in it. Other two have a hidden message in it. Near my left leg there is a table made of glass. While sitting on the chair I am facing a transparent glass wall. Through the glass wall I see a garden with bluegrass lawn and Chamomile plants. There is a pond which has water filled for birds and my dog. The walls of the garden are made of stones with texture like the one in Maratha forts. If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need. In the morning sunlight enters through the window and lightens up the room. At night the white fluorescent lamps light up the room and I see quiet, dark night outside the window. A good lighting is one of the key features of a good library.
Behind me there is a shelf where I keep my books. The shelf is made up of wood which is lavish walnut in colour. Some of the books are arranged horizontally and some vertically. Horizontal ones are thick and vertical ones are long and thin. On my right I have barometer floor reading lamp which I adjust according to my needs. It has a white light and not the traditional yellow because I find yellow one strong and exhaustive. There is a door to my right which leads to backyard. A small window to my right brings some fresh air into the room.
The top corners of the room have speakers for playing soothing music while I read. Yeah! I have the habit to listen music while reading. The room has no clock. I don’t want to limit my presence in this paradise.
“Waiting is Painful. Forgetting is Painful. But not knowing which to do is worst kind of Suffering” – Paulo Coelho
How helpless have you ever felt? It wasn’t when I failed to pass a paper for three consecutive times, or when I worked on a project which was getting complicated every single day. I wasn’t helpless when I had no money in my pocket or when I had to spend a day without food. The quote above describes my helplessness at the moment.
A man can live on hope. WAITING for someone means hoping that the person will be with you in the future. It’s beautiful to imagine. One needs a strong will, trust, and endurance to keep such a hope. It is not necessary that you will get what you want at the time you want it. But desire to have it impels one to try harder till he gets it. Waiting in love is painful especially when your love is away and with someone else. Love is so powerful that one tends to forget himself and live for his love. What makes this easy is the fact that your love is away from you because of certain bounding, compulsion, or helplessness and not because she doesn’t love you. All you know is you are waiting for someone who loves you equally as you do.
What if your love is living happily with someone who loves her more than you do? You feel happy for her and try to FORGET her. Well that’s not easy. You are happy but at the same time you are hurt. It has been said, ‘time heals all wounds’. I do not agree. The wounds remain. In the time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.
But when someone blows hot and cold in love, life becomes COMPLICATED. What if your love is not sure about her feelings for you? I never doubt my own feelings. I know what I feel for someone. At times I may doubt someone’s feelings for me, but I never doubt my feelings for someone. Falling in Love is supposed to be a happy experience and not a confusing one. I don’t give false hopes and I don’t live on false hopes. “I would come to you one day. If you are available I would be happy and if not I won’t mind because when I love it alone suffice me.” Whoa! She’s in love with me and I should wait for her. But a moment later I get to hear, “I feel strongly for you, but it is not love because love is pure madness. I haven’t yet achieved that madness.” Well this raises a hope that Johnny you’ve to try harder to make her fall. This would raise a hope and make it difficult for you to forget her. Again a moment later I hear something totally different, “I can never get committed. I am not sure if I would feel the same after few years as I feel it now. I want to see how I feel for you after four years.” Fuck! I sit down in disappointment with my hands on my head. So it’s a relationship which has everything but COMMITMENT. At times I hear this one: “We are not into any relationship.” So there is no relationship and no commitment.
I am helpless. When I am away, I restore myself. I would find a way out of it.
“WHY DOES A MAN STOP BEING ROMANTIC?”
Romance always attracts me towards it. So does this headline. My friend is having a confidence that men tend to change few years down the relationship. Well she says this from her past relationships. I have read somewhere that a woman tends to recall her man’s behaviour with her. It tells her how much he loves her! That’s true my friends.
Somewhere on the web I read a quote about Gentleman: A real man never stops trying to show a girl how much she means to him, even after he’s got her. The keyword here is “try”. Men love to chase. The longer a woman takes to fall, the harder a man tries to get her. The article in newspaper quoted a wrong word “hunt”. We don’t “hunt” women we “get” women. What happens after we get a woman? We start expecting. What do we expect? This is not a simple one to answer.
Men love to flirt at all point of time. But after getting into a relationship most men think that flirting is harmful for their relationship. Flirting may make them disloyal towards their partner. They stop flirting with other women and expect their woman to do the same. I have heard many guys saying: “From the time I am being into a relationship with you I have kept a distance from my female friends.” Was that necessary? At no point it shows your loyalty for your partner. Moreover, you don’t flirt with all your female friends at all point of time. They are just friends. What if your partner flirts with you like she did during courtship? Men love when their partner gets naughty, flirty and tease.
Women feel cheated when they see their partner’s changing behaviour. They think that only they put efforts to keep the relationship. Well that’s true. Women tend to put efforts in a relationship. Love is selfless. If at a point of time you think that your partner does not love you the way you do then talk to him. Never let go the communication between you and your partner. He loves you and he will comfort you. He will bring the spark and light up the dimness in the relationship. When we get our girl we take it for granted that she would step beside us at every point of time no matter what happens. Then we step towards achieving something else in our lives. A man is very proud of his achievements. I don’t call a woman an achievement. She’s the love of his life. All the achievements are useless if a man loses his love. Even modern women have goals. A real man would know the importance of her goals in her life. We should encourage each other to achieve more and more in life.
If romance comes naturally to you then you won’t stop being romantic either during courtship or during relationship. At the end of the day there’s nothing beautiful than a company of your loved one. The hug, the kiss, the smiles, the tears all matter a lot to each other. Understanding each other well and clearing the doubts with proper communication is always effective. Most important is to understand the fact that even if you are in a relationship you do have your own life. It applies equally to men and women. Getting into a relationship doesn’t mean you break your relationship with friends; it doesn’t mean you stop living your professional life that you had before the relationship; it doesn’t mean that you don’t owe some time for yourself. It depends on both the partners how they keep their relationship charming, beautiful and romantic.
A man should understand that his woman needs to feel special all the time. Love is about giving. Give her all you can give. Surprise her every day. Flatter her, pamper her, and lift her off the toes. All you know is you love her and she loves you too.
Once I was travelling to New Delhi from Nagpur. In my company there were a Buddhist Monk (Bhikkhu) and a young Christian man. I am a Hindu. The discussion kicked off with general topic of introduction. Of course the monk didn’t need any introduction. He was wearing a reddish-yellow robe. The other guy was young, fat and talkative. Most people think that it’s never a good idea to discuss religion or politics with people you don’t really know. I don’t think so. A conversation gets dirty only when we speak without listening or we don’t understand the fact that other person thinks differently and can have different views.
It was a time of election in Delhi. Aam Aadmi Party and Arvind Kejriwal were common among people’s chit chats. The Monk had a good understanding of politics. His Maithili accent told that he is from Bihar. I never mind listening to what people say. I hear them. If I find someone wrong I don’t interrupt. I let them speak. I convey my views after listening to them. At times it happen that people don’t let you speak; it’s the time when my diplomatic side works perfectly. Talk about the person and he will hear you for hours. Monk was a good orator and a good listener. Wilson, the young guy was equally polite. Usually I don’t comment on political issues. Of course, my ears were open while Wilson and the Monk were talking about politics.
After having guy’s discussion with Wilson our topic of discussion shifted to Religion. He told me about his encounter with a qazi (a Muslim judge). I got to know much about Islam from Wilson, who in fact had heard it from the qazi. The Monk was listening to our conversation. A preacher is meant to preach his/her religion. We people tend to have a negative connotation to all the things a preacher says. Of course, it’s wrong if a preacher preaches his religion by dominating other religions. The Monk participated in our conversation and he expressed his views on Islam. He gave respect to the religion. He told about Bhikkhu’s and Buddhism.
I don’t mind talking about religion with unknown people. I didn’t know the Monk as well as Wilson. Neither had they known me. But the conversation was informative. I gained a lot out of it. We are not abusing anyone on the grounds of religion or caste. If a Hindu says that he is vegetarian and he hates meat it doesn’t mean he hates a person who eats meat. Stereotypes exist who can’t even tolerate the company, touch or presence of people belonging to certain religion or who practice certain things which are not in their own religion. Society is the reflection of you. I think secular and I see everyone secular. Words control everything. Words can stop a war and words can start a war. The future of this world lies in hands of Diplomatic abilities of nations. The concept of soft power is on rise. Talking and knowing about each other’s religion is a small example of the big picture called Diplomacy can save us. So next time you get to talk about religion go ahead and explore. There is lot to learn than you can expect. Be polite and a good listener.
When I was born my grandma brought a golden spoon and a bottle of honey. Honey was the first thing I have tasted on this planet. In Ayurveda, honey plays a role of blood purifier. Isn’t it an interesting fact about your life – the first thing you have tasted? I hope many of the Indians would have honey as their answer. It’s a ritual at the birth. As I grew older I tasted different food items. What I know is everything has a unique taste. It’s similar to unique people around me, isn’t it?
What am I, Vanilla, Chocolate or something else entirely? Everything in this world is connected. I wonder why the term Isolation derived. For example, to describe vanilla I would say a spice that has a sweet, perfumed aroma with a woody or smoky flavour. I can’t describe vanilla without relating it to woody or smoky flavour. Similarly we describe Men and Women by relating them to other humans, ideas, animals, professions, and sometimes things. This is why we have “dusty eyes”, “smoking hot” lips, “bubble” butt and “washboard” abs. My good deed makes me a hero and bad deed a villain. What makes me unique?
Some people love vanilla, some love chocolate, and there are others who love garlic and onion too. I am what I am. Sometimes I add up to someone’s taste and sometimes I am avoided even by name. I am nobody, but I am someone. What if a recipe says that by adding me to a dish will make the dish unpalatable? Does this mean I am useless? No! Societal norms are like recipe, they are written just to make a good society like a recipe makes a delicious dish. Am I antisocial? No, I am anti-idiot. To avoid the so called norms one finds Isolation and hence came the term Isolation. I am not isolated. I live in this society. I am a part of it. I reflect what I am. I do what I want to do. I don’t get lost in the societal norms. I do no harm, and take no shit! I am a being. I reach everything that is new and let it discover a part of myself. My breaths are my own; no one else does that for me. If I am able to breathe for myself why can’t I derive myself?