Me: I need your help
Conversation kicks off but her body language contradicts with her words. She seems to be open with her answers but her body is closed. Why? Possible reasons could be that she is unaware of my intentions or probably she sees me as a threat. Did I do anything? Was my body language projecting my need for mating? Do I always look desperate for sex? Was I really desperate? Did I think of sex before approaching her? There are many questions that can arise out of the situation.
India is witnessing a change in male-female relationships. Women today are competing with men and are having a greater exposure than they had in the past few decades. On the other hand, men aren’t familiar with the situation where women can lead men. We all will remain slaves of our mating instincts no matter how much we progress. This is the root cause of all the problems that are encountered in the contemporary Indian society. Men see women as potential mates and women tend to protect themselves from mating. Apart from mating, men-women in the modern world share lots of other relationships. First we need to understand the fact that mating is basic to humans all over the world. A man will always see at butt when a woman leaves the door. There’s nothing wrong. But the way such things are perceived in today’s society has some issues.
She: (with her hands in front of her body, palms up and shoulders shrugged) This is not the place where you can talk with men. Big cities or metro cities are places where people won’t mind if a girl and boy talks. Also, people are quite open minded.
Me: What do you mean by open minded?
She: You know, just because I am nice to him, he shouldn’t think that I like him. Just because we are talking doesn’t mean I want him to fuck me.
Me: Why don’t you find me narrow minded? You didn’t give a thought before using the word ‘fuck’ in front of me.
She: (laughs) Everyone is not like you.
Me: I know
What I want to say is, a girl and a boy can have conversation at any place and at any time. It’s all in your mind that a particular place is good and a particular place is bad. To change the society we need to change individual thinking. If women aren’t open to men, if they perceive men as nothing but addicts of their carnal desires they would do nothing except creating barriers between their freedom and themselves. Freedom is a state of mind. Men on the other hand, need to understand that being casanova isn’t the only way to define your masculinity. Don’t approach women with the pure intention of getting laid. Believe me a woman can make a lot of difference in your life besides tits and ass.
She: Someone sent me a friend request on Facebook.
Me: What did you do?
She: Nothing, he’s a jerk
Me: How did you know?
She: We don’t have any mutual friend, I don’t know him personally.
Me: Yes you are right, you don’t know him personally. What if he had approached you in real life say, at a coffee shop?
She: Why me?
Me: Because you’re pretty, charming and interesting.
She: I know, and I hate when people stare at me. Ha, if someone handsome is there, I would give it a thought. (winks with a naughty smile)
Well, Facebook or any other social networking media has privacy options. Its individuals call if they like to be open or private. In case of real life, beautiful women are approached daily by lots of men. They like some and they reject a few. There’s no harm in approaching a beautiful women unless you want her directly in your bed after exchanging Hi.
We all watch american movies. We have seen how they have defined men-women relationships. At some point we want to have such relationships. Friends with benefits, No strings attached, Love and other drugs have exceptionally defined romance in a new way. Is it possible to understand the true nature of such relationships at a place where people have gender bias at every step. You visit any temple, any queue of people waiting for paying electricity bill or buying railway tickets, most of the schools and colleges you will see men and women have different lanes, different benches, different queues. Why? A child goes to school and from his childhood he sees a girl as something different, because she sits in a different row than boys. Worst is the case with same sex schools. Do you think he would be able to mix up with women at work place? How much do they understand each other? Is healthy flirting a different thing? Most of the people will say flirting is bad. They will immediately doubt other person’s intentions. You cannot flirt with your friend. If she has a boyfriend then she is double pissed, first by your unusual flirting and later by her boyfriend’s possessiveness. Sex is fun. But is often perceived as a bad thing. Who made it bad? We.
We need to understand the basics of human relations. Of course I would mate with a woman rather than a sheep. I am not that animal fantasy guy. But this doesn’t mean I can’t have a casual conversation with women. This doesn’t mean I can stay out at night and work with a beautiful lady. This doesn’t say that if my profession is to photograph nude models, I won’t arouse their emotions by little bit of flirting to have better pictures. How else would you maintain professionalism if you aren’t in control of your carnal desires? Remember healthy flirting? One thing that needs to be changed is parenting the child in terms of relationships. A teenager is ought to have or at least think of sexual encounters. Our job is to guide him the right way. He is physically ready for intercourse. Our task is to prepare him mentally with proper ethics. Until we are clear and above our mating instincts we wont be able to enjoy a true male-female relationship.